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Day 2 Challenge of Gratefulness----Written by my friend Rose
My ultimate blessing came in three and I'd like to dedicate this day as a testament to how precious they all are to me.
To my son Vince, I am and will always be grateful for you. You were cheeky, playful, smart, funny , sweet and kind... Now that you've grown ... still smart, funny and kind but not as sweet as when you were little. The playfulness and cheekiness are replaced by subtle rigging that ends in fight and brotherly banter which at times I find unbearable and you are the one who takes the brunt of my anger. There was once a conversation after this that saw me and you crying because you felt that you were never a good son to me. My heart sank because I realized I have not given you enough time and space, oftentimes forgetting that you're only a child yourself yet I expected to behave and act like an adult. You are most affected when dad and I have a fight. I saw how disturbed you were when you think we were separating ... It's then that I thought I will never do something to hurt you this much. I may struggle personally whenever things are bad but I will rise up, pick myself up and be the mom you need for as long as God will let me. I am sorry for my shortcomings, my crazy moods, nonstop nagging and all of my mommy stuff... I love you nonetheless and will always be proud of you. I look at you now and feel an enormous pride that not only you are growing to be handsome, you are slowly taking on responsibility of your siblings and some of your actions. I pray that you continually learn, develop and discover yourself and I wish you nothing but the best. I will be here no matter what.
To my other son Franz, I am grateful for you being my child because you are my comfort and my stability. You were always quiet, sweet and lovable and you remain so to this day. The good mornings, the hellos, your gentle hands massaging my head and feet (for free), your funny sense of humour of which you are not even aware of, are some of your endearing qualities. I worry about you because I felt you were slow in catching up at school and I am having you assessed for any possible support you may need. At times I thought you don't understand instructions and I get frustrated ... I know you get scared and freezes in the middle of a task and that's when I realized there I go again and I am very very sorry. I saw that my attitude is dependent of yours and I strive each day to be the best possible example for you. At times I can't be my best and I know you are most understanding too because we always talk and say how we feel. You give me a reason to be more tolerant of you, of myself and of others. I love your hugs your kisses your smile and all about you. Once when dad and I were not good, you were worried most about where are we going to live more than anything else. Also one of your goals at the start of school is to make friends ... At the end of term you came home with the portfolio and there reads... I still have one friend which I feel sorry about but find funny altogether. I worry less now having seen your reports and not as bad as I thought. I let you do assignments because you know when to call me if you need help. You are a very clever boy in your own right and you have an integrity of a rock. I am extremely proud of you when I lost you for at least 15 mins or maybe more in Mt Buller 2 yrs ago... Twas the most excruciating time and never was so desperate. But there you were, found your way to the information and waited until you got found. You told me then that you felt sad that you couldn't see me and remembered what the school taught, to seek help. When your only very best friend got picked on in school and you chose to speak up for him and got messy because other friends stepped in... You also stood up against an older friend who was visibly and physically upset and reasoned that it wasn't your fault and has to accept it. Well, you stood up as well when I start to raise my voice and quickly hands me the book " How to make your kids Happy" as a reminder to keep my cool. I always tell you off when you and Geppy fight although you are just trying to stop him from hurting you or telling him that it's not right. I hope my love, my concern and good intentions surpasses all the things I am doing wrong. You have the most pure heart and I look forward to seeing you grow and be the best that you can be. I will always be behind your back and ready to support you all the time.
Lastly, my baby Jeppy Albert ... I am forever grateful for all the happiness you have brought this family. Being told by many thoughtful friends that "it's gonna be a girl this time"... I had unconsciously expected it to be so that's why I cried when the scan showed it was definitely another boy!!! But I will not have it any other way. You complete my little macho family and I feel that I am very beautiful everyday(uh uh). You are your own character and I am mesmerized by all of your ways. I enjoy every bit of your warmth, sweetness and dependence because I know you will outgrow it someday ... The constant I miss you mom I love you mom Where are you mom even when we're together are priceless. You are slowly gaining your independence and I'm proud of the little man that you are becoming. I enjoy our shop hopping and you getting yourself ready long before I/we do. Seeing your socks inside out but looking at how proud you are at it is simply fulfilling. I feel that I can always be myself when I'm with you and I know you will love me regardless because that's how much I love you. Looking forward to everyday knowing that you and your brothers are doing okay, loves family and believes in God. My prayers are for you to develop a strong sense of self and high regard for family and others. I can only keep on praying that life will be gentle on all of you and that yours will be much brighter than mine. Thank you boys for all the love we share, the lessons, the misunderstandings, the family times, the new beginnings and all that there is in the future. I am extremely lucky as I get to write these to you and one to cherish in our lifetime....
I now then nominate a very dear friend, Grace D to take on this challenge ...love you ya!
@MICHELLE07 @蓝山夜妖
I guess this mom's feeling for her children has echoed what you both have felt about parenting! |
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