找回密码
 FreeOZ用户注册
查看: 3927|回复: 11
打印 上一主题 下一主题

[edu] 雅思作文:说说看法

[复制链接]
跳转到指定楼层
1#
发表于 23-11-2010 22:02:50 | 只看该作者 回帖奖励 |倒序浏览 |阅读模式

马上注册,结交更多好友,享用更多功能,让你轻松玩转社区。

您需要 登录 才可以下载或查看,没有帐号?FreeOZ用户注册

x
刚修了一篇写作,转过来说说看法。

写作经验肯定比翻译经验弱,仅从写作的Common Sense说。

评分

参与人数 1威望 +50 收起 理由
yearshappy + 50 谢谢分享!

查看全部评分

回复  

使用道具 举报

2#
 楼主| 发表于 23-11-2010 22:04:34 | 只看该作者
Someone think children should attend extra classes after school, other disagree. Discuss both opinion and give your own view.

(Quote) http://freeoz.org/ibbs/thread-930984-1-1.html

(Amended)
It is common to see that many children begin to attend extra classes after they come back from school. Additional hours in study may mean quantity but not necessarily suggest quality in children’s education.

Children can benefit from extra classes as they get more opportunities for enhanced study or development of hobbies. For example, students who attend extra classes in relation to school subjects get a chance to review what they have not grasped at school so that they can catch up with fast learners. Through extra study, they may also extend what they have learned at school. In addition, students can choose extra-curricular activities in the subjects that are not available at school, such as piano, chess, and Chinese painting etc. The extra classes thus provide good opportunities for children’s continuing education and growth.

However, the quality of education cannot be warranted by increased hours in study, especially when extra classes go beyond the burden of students and parents. Students may easily become tired after a long time in study. Some students even go far away to attend evening classes and return home late. If the balance between study and rest is broken, children’s health will be jeopardized. Extra classes also appear expensive for some families, so they increase the financial burden of parents. Without a sound family environment, it is also uneasy for children to learn smoothly and successfully.

Therefore, children are encouraged to take more opportunities after school hours either to support their study at school or to develop their personal interest, unless the study pressure or financial burden goes so far that it is better to study no more and no less.

评分

参与人数 1威望 +50 收起 理由
pinxinge + 50 你太有才了!

查看全部评分

回复  

使用道具 举报

3#
 楼主| 发表于 23-11-2010 22:13:07 | 只看该作者
1. I, me, my:
Academic writing最忌讳用词。
不用说这些,别人都知道是“你”写的、认为的,“你的”观点、看法。

2. I think, i believe
同上

3. Agree/disagree:
可以从你的观点里infer。

I agree, I totally agree, i completely agree
没有好到哪里去。
如果真的agree,不用大声喊,读者都能看出来。

评分

参与人数 2威望 +100 收起 理由
pinxinge + 50 你太有才了!
yearshappy + 50 谢谢分享!

查看全部评分

回复  

使用道具 举报

4#
发表于 23-11-2010 22:54:21 | 只看该作者
回复  

使用道具 举报

5#
发表于 23-11-2010 23:17:58 | 只看该作者
beyond the burden of students and parrents??????


"beyond the ability of students" might be better.

评分

参与人数 1威望 +30 收起 理由
pinxinge + 30 谢谢分享!

查看全部评分

回复  

使用道具 举报

6#
 楼主| 发表于 24-11-2010 10:49:27 | 只看该作者
???

The same question!

"Sense" it.
回复  

使用道具 举报

7#
发表于 24-11-2010 11:49:44 | 只看该作者
为什么这个作文题目都有语法错误?
回复  

使用道具 举报

8#
发表于 24-11-2010 16:04:04 | 只看该作者
原帖由 charade 于 24-11-2010 11:49 发表
为什么这个作文题目都有语法错误?


为什么不直接指出题目语法错误的个数呢?估计老师在考大家
回复  

使用道具 举报

9#
发表于 25-11-2010 10:40:24 | 只看该作者
Someone think children should attend extra classes after school, other disagree. Discuss both opinion and give your own view.

首先,someone是不定代词(我可能说错这个称谓,不确定),一般这种地方用some people。如果用someone, which is incorrect anyway, 那么后面think就应该加s

其次,应该是others disagree,不是other disagree。  

第三,应为both opinions, 单复数错误。

短短一句话,这么多错,这个题目是怎么拟的啊?

回复  

使用道具 举报

10#
发表于 25-11-2010 10:45:03 | 只看该作者
就文章本身来说,我肯定写(改)不出这样的水平  

同样对beyond the burden of.... 有疑问。就是sense非常不对。估计拿给西人看,他们会不明白什么意思。但我不知道应该怎么说。
回复  

使用道具 举报

11#
 楼主| 发表于 29-11-2010 12:39:02 | 只看该作者

broken English

"Go beyond"?
or  "beyond the burden of"?
回复  

使用道具 举报

12#
 楼主| 发表于 29-11-2010 14:06:08 | 只看该作者

introduction或可复述问题,但最好点明主题

e.g.

1. Educational issue is a never outdated topic of discussion. Now, let us focus on whether high-school graduates need tour or work for a period of time before they start their undergraduate days.

可以给一些constructive意见,以助改进。
(Quote: http://www.freeoz.org/ibbs/viewt ... p;page=1#pid3183796)

2. Education is not everything about school activities. Travel or work experiences can direct a school leaver in what area he or she is to receive tertiary education, though they may play a superficial role sometimes.
回复  

使用道具 举报

您需要登录后才可以回帖 登录 | FreeOZ用户注册

本版积分规则

小黑屋|手机版|Archiver|FreeOZ论坛

GMT+11, 4-2-2025 05:17 , Processed in 0.049917 second(s), 29 queries , Gzip On, Redis On.

Powered by Discuz! X3.2

© 2001-2013 Comsenz Inc.

快速回复 返回顶部 返回列表